Every time you have a conversation with someone are you listening or running off like diarrhea where the other person can't get a word in edge-wise? Well, in case you say no, let me tell you we ALL are guilty of this at one time or another. So, without further ado, let's jump right into the killing of a conversation here we go:
1. Always Needing To Have The Last Word:. We're guilty of this and yep, so am I unless we are a dictatorship, we are cutting them out of the conversation. What we are trying to prove is that we are a know it all and what the other person has to say, well insignificant. If anyone has an input that can be useful, we'll never know as they won't speak up for fear of being over spoken.
2. Always Needing To Be Right: If we are having a conversation that seems to be wrong, we just have to jump right in and set it right (we hope). Then again, we may not even know what we are saying to prove a point and may end up looking like a fool. This kind of situation will cause people to become defensive by having someone jump in to tell them facts, they stop listening.
3. Just Can't Stop Talking: Here we go and yes, we're all guilty of this at one time or another. We get into a conversation we started or adding to it, we began to talk, talk talk and keep going like the energizer bunny without regards for the other person. We just run on and on like a water faucet where the other person ends up saying the hell with it. You may be a good person and a wonderful conversationalist but talking for 10 mins, you're now dominating the floor. Be surer to include others for an over all great conversation. Remember it aint all about you, it's about everybody in the convo.
4. You're Not Giving Others A Chance To Speak: Guilty as sin (we all are in this together) when we just jump right into a conversation and talk about something that has absolutely nothing to do with the original conversation at hand. The person who is talking will feel we are not listening to what they have said and find them boring and began to ignore them. They will close themselves off without saying anther word. Share the floor, share the conversation and keep it flowing properly.
5. Interrupting: Yep, we seen this before where people just jump right in without apologizing and start running off at the mouth just to be heard and may not even know what the conversation is about. Ignorant? You bet it is UNLESS there is an emergency or a specific point that needs to be made. This is called bullying the conversation and believe me, no man or woman, boy or girl likes anyone that does that. The only time this would be acceptable is if the speaker is at the time limit given such as ten minutes and they have two minutes left.
6. Giving Advice: Unless you are a certified counselor and an expert in certain areas being discussed, keep your advice to yourself unless specifically asked for it, and then try and avoid that as well. There is no better way to kill a relationship than giving advice that may end up being wrong to the receiving party and you will be the blame.
7. Being A Slow Speaker: Ok, We've seen these kind of folks before who speaks so slow that the conversation will not end until the first snow fall of 2025. You don't have to speed up like a a race horse but speak in an acceptable manner and pace so that you can keep the attention of your listeners. The worst thing to do is put everyone to sleep or node mode.
With these pointers I hope this helps you to become a better conversational speaker and a great listener.